How to Deal With a Toxic Person
Monica Segeren
how to deal with a toxic person

What is a toxic person? WebMD describes them as: “anyone whose behavior adds negativity and upset to your life. Many times, people who are toxic are dealing with their own stresses and traumas. To do this, they act in ways that don’t present them in the best light and usually upset others along the way.” Usually toxic people manipulate, abuse physically, mentally, verbally or emotionally, they abuse substances, and so on. WebMD also suggests that they could struggle with an undiagnosed personality problem. Whoever they may be, they bring a lot of drama and make you feel bad about yourself. This also can be family, your significant other, friend or coworker. This is something that applies to everyone. Here you can find a list of seven common types of toxic people. 

What Now? 

If you see the signs of someone having toxic traits in your life, it is important to confront them. Whether it is telling them that you are not comfortable with them being in your life anymore or setting firm boundaries—it is important to set them and stick to them. It is a long and uncomfortable journey (I am speaking from experience) but it is something that needs to be done for your well-being. Guilt and attachment are the number one things to draw you back into being around that person but do not fall for it. It sure is easier said than done, and you will hear that a lot along your journey. However, the journey will end with a clear mind and a whole lot less to deal with in your everyday life. Women’s Health Magazine posted an article about toxic family members a few years ago and it has helped me tremendously. Here is a section that I wanted to share from them: 

“Remember: It’s not your responsibility to ‘save’ this kind of person or keep them in your life, and you did nothing to ‘deserve’ the way they treated you. Still, it can be incredibly hard (and scary) to cut an abuser out of your life. Here are some tips that might help you on this journey.

  • If you can, cut off all communication: block them on social media, block their number, don’t invite them to family gatherings, and so on.
  • Reach out to a trusted friend or family member and ask them to help you navigate the situation
  • Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline to speak with a professional
  • See a therapist who can help you end the relationship safely”

Do What Is Best For You 

As someone who has been through this journey multiple times with various people, this is not easy. You will need a support system and someone to advocate for your mental health when you do not have the strength. Depending on your closeness with a person, the harder it might be to let go of them. If you have given this person multiple chances to change but they have done nothing but run you around in circles—be the change. Do what is best for you and realize that the relationship that is damaging you is not worth the agony and the uncomfortable nature. You are not alone. Stay home for a while and practice some self care. Take a deep breath in and exhale out the negativity that you don’t need any longer.

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